What I am realizing: I suck at project management. Through working on this thesis project and other projects I've been involved in, I have noticed a pattern: it always takes me twice as long as I plan to do what I say I'm going to do. I need deadlines, deadlines imposed by others, not myself. Lacking those, things turn into one long, lazy semi-vacation until the week before the thing is due.

I'm feeling a little better this weekend. My sister is here. She always makes me laugh. I have made a list of things to work on before my thesis is finished. The list isn't long. Lists give me peace of mind. It's all under control, right?

I've decided I'm going to go to the school counseling center tomorrow. For some advice, if nothing else, and a chance to be honest about what is going on with my life. I'm a reasonably happy, sane person, I think I am just feeling a lot of stress and have a lot of confusion about what I should be doing right now.