I am sad and tired and I can't think of anything that will help except writing it down. There's this guy at school and I think he is really cute and nice and stuff....but the thing is, we are friends, and I just can't handle that. For one, I do think he is attractive- he is so tall, and his hands are just so perfect, and he is just so nice and easygoing I can't believe it. I guess I am not used to being treated so kindly. I always assume that all people, especially males, are jerks, and then there's this guy who helps me out on my stupid lab for database class and asks me about school stuff and asks me what I think. We've had real conversations, some that have lasted more than 30 seconds. And all this when I know I can be really moody and standoffish, to the point of rudeness. I have a hard time even saying hi to someone when I see them. So why this?
The point is, there is no possibility of romantic attachment with this person. For one, he is not interested in me in that way. He may even have a gf- I've never asked, nor do I want to. We have really different interests, and he is kind of dull when it comes to school stuff. He's your typical guy, I guess you could say, always being a goof.
Yet there is something of a friendship between us that cannot be denied, and I am not used to that at all.